Buying a TV (channeling Joyce Grenfell)

Right kids. Me and your Mum have decided it’s time to buy a new TV. Exciting eh.

Yes, yes, it’ll be a good one, we’ve decided to get a good one. It might not be the biggest, it still has to fit in the corner, but it will be a good one, lots better than the one we’ve got now.

OK, but you know there are some decisions we have to make, right. We’re going to have to decide which channels we want.

Well, yes it would be nice if we could get them all, but different TV’s show different channels don’t they, you know that.

Why? Well that’s just the way it is.

What? Well yes we could just give them more money, you’d have thought so wouldn’t you, but actually we can’t. They don’t operate like that.

That doesn’t make sense? No, I guess it doesn’t does it.

Aren’t they trying to make money? Well yes they are. That’s why…. that’s why…

Look, you see, the TV people, they have deals with the people who make the programs, and the people who make the programs, well, they only want you to watch their programs on certain types of TV.

That doesn’t make sense either? …….No I guess it doesn’t does it.

Well yes, you would have thought that the people who make the programs want as many people as possible to watch.

Yes, if it was available on all the TV’s then more people could watch it. That’s true.

Look kids, you’re just going to have to trust me on this one. We just can’t get all the channels, it’s not possible, they won’t sell it to us like that. We’re going to have to choose which ones we want.

No, it doesn’t make sense. I agree.

Sorry, what was that, I didn’t hear you?

Please stop mumbling, say that again.

Adults are stupid. Ah…ok


CONTEXT: Please imagine this conversation happening anytime from 1980 up until 2003 (…or so). The link below describes the real situation as it occurs in today’s world (a very good read), and a Youtube clip to identify Joyce Grenfell for those who have never heard of her.

I still don’t want to be a part of your fucking ecosystem



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